1 -800- JENNY- PURRY

1- 800 -JENNY- PURRY
By Chloe Dinnerrolly (Jan. 18, 2012)

People aren’t the only ones making diet resolutions for the New Year after packing on pounds of glazed ham scraps, leftover beef stuffed pies, and bone shaped sugar cookies during the holidays. Taking after their owners, over 50% of dogs and cats in the US are overweight, obese, or need the Jaws of Life to peel them off the couch during a commercial break of Animal Cops to reach the litter box 2 feet away. Helping put an end to the marshmallow pup epidemic, Purina has joined forces with Jenny Craig to create Project Pet Slim Down; an online weight loss program for tubby tabbies and husky huskies battling the hefty issue of canine/feline weight loss.

With Project Pet Slim Down, dining consists of portion-controlled meals provided by Purina Veterinary Diet Food with fat free turkey bacon treats. Members receive exercising tips for their burly furry friends such as playing fetch with a 5-pound weighted Frisbee, signing up for a pet yoga class, and working out to fitness videos starring Richard Simmons doing jumpimg jacks in a glittered catsuit to Donna Summer tunes.

Users can also keep track of their weight loss progress on the website and post before and after photos of Fluffy wearing a bikini.

With better nutrition and a more active lifestyle, the weight loss program improves your pet’s health, life longevity, and overall self esteem. Everyday dogs and cats face public scrutiny as a plumpy pet. It’s hard enough watching those skinny bitches flashing their 8 nipples on America’s Next Dog Model and Gisele Meow-chen on the cover of Catsmopolitan magazine.

Whether you walk on 2 or 4 legs, life in the fat lane can be tough. Luckily those days of “Blubber Binx” and “Muffin Top Max” are over. After a month on the diet plan, results show pets can easily fit underneath coffee tables, walk around the block without getting winded and find that tight Christmas sweater Grandma knitted now too baggy.

Turn your round hound into a hot dog with buns of steel and chubby kitty into a true Pussycat Doll. With Project Pet Slim Down, your pet’s new sexy slender figure will change their image from McFatty to Mac Daddy with more butts to sniff, tails to chase, and an all around happier outlook on life. Don’t be surprised to find a gift of a dead rodent on your doorstep as a thank you.


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