Your Cat Is Cooler Than You

Your Cat Is Cooler Than You
By Chloe Dinnerrolly (June 6, 2011)

Your cat is cooler than you -and it has nothing to do with the Michael Bolton greatest hits CD you play in the car every day. Thanks to Friskies, little Whiskers now shops at Urban Outfitters, listens to Belle & Sebastian on vinyl and combs a faux hawk between his ears during his morning tongue bath, since the cat food brand has just released a new iPad app exclusively for felines.

After clawing up the furniture, sparking ground shaking sneeze attacks, and smothering babies in their sleep, cats can now scratch up the $700 screen of the iPad you saved weeks of Subway paychecks to get. With games like “Cat Fishing”, “Tasty Treasure Hunt” and “This Is So Much Cooler Than A Ball Of Yarn”, the hot expensive toy even has Mr. Bigglesworth’s celebrity endorsement.

However, not everyone is happy with the new hipster cat craze. Outraged and jealous, dogs everywhere are demanding “Duck Hunt”, “Chewy Shoe-y”, and “Mailman Madness” iPad game apps to be made and sold. Pet stores now must go high-tech with their supplies because those litter boxes that amazingly clean themselves are so last year.

The Aristocats were right, everybody does want to be a cat.