Abortion Girl Makes a Swirl with Spin Art

Abortion Girl Makes a Swirl with Spin Art
By Chloe Dinnerrolly (April 20, 2008)

No matter what mood you may be in, I don't know of anyone who'd pass up on a good dead baby joke. But of course, leave it to some performance artist with matted hair to screw it up for the rest of us, because a new sanguinary controversy ain't bringing in any LOLs.

Aliza Shvartz, an art student at Yale University, decided for her final project to knock herself up only to knock the embryos out, over and over again. The art comes in when she videotapes it all (Hopefully with a tripod; nothing more nauseating than watching a shaky screen!) and uses the blood and matter collected from her abortions as her medium.

Using your own blood after running out of paint is understandable, but this is kind of pushing it. There's no word on where or how she was able to preserve her bodily deposits during the process, but it wouldn't be too surprising to find them all stored in her own refrigerator, right next to last night's Chinese.

Shvartz is one of those Do-It-Yourself types. And when it came to getting pregnant, did things a little differently than the average drunk college skank. She didn't actually have sex with anyone, since men can be so undependable. And when it came to the periodical evictions, didn't even bother going to an abortion clinic. Instead she took semen donations -from buds with plenty to share- to insert into her snatch with a syringe. Then later she'd open up a box of Plan B and wait it out --sitting alongside an egg timer. DING!

Sounds like another attention-grabby feminist with grizzly bear armpits and misfitted clothes on the prowl, but I doubt even Ani DiFranco would have Shvartz's back on this one.

Such an ordeal for the sake of art. I mean, who really wants to be the owner and manager of some deranged import-export business? All the inserting and aborting, inserting and aborting; it sounds so tiring, not to mention messy. But obviously monthly visits from Aunt Flow aren't enough for a solid piece.

As shocking and appalling as it all is, one can only pray she did a reasonable job at cleaning up after herself. If not, then that would just be bad etiquette.

After learning about the exhibit, Yale University claims it to all to be a hoax, and that so-called blood documented actually came from a Heinz bottle, rather than Shvartz's vagina. Shvartz's still stands by her work, stating that the project, is in fact, the real deal, and that what you see, is what you hope to never get with your shrimp cocktail.

Either way, now Tub Girl's finally got a run for her money.

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The one that got away: