A Heroic Hound
By Chloe Dinnerrolly (March 30, 2012)
Last Saturday in West Yorkshire, England, a basset hound named George, was simply carrying out his daily routine; blasting Guns and Roses on the stereo and trashing the house into a war zone of chewed up shoes, pee puddles, and a floor mural of spilled Froot Loops, when he got himself into a dangerous predicament. In the mix of all his doggie fun, the hound got himself tangled in the telephone cord and began to choke.
George’s life flashed before his droopy eyes. Images flickered of playing tackle football with his siblings as a puppy, snatching BLT’s from his owner plate, and the neighbor’s poodle, Sugarplum and her fine smelling booty. All dogs go to Heaven, but George refused to step into the light. At 2 years-old, there were plenty of ducks left to hunt and legs to hump. There was no stopping this party animal.
Better known for their big ears and not their smarts, basset hounds have been getting a bad rap since the ‘50s when Elvis bashed the breed in his hit song, “Hound Dog”. It’s 2012 and time for a change. Twisted in telephone wire, George dialed 999 for emergency rescue. Luckily the basset had used the phone before to order pizzas while throwing house parties whenever the folks were out. His bad boy ways had paid off. After the operator heard the hound gasping for air on the other line, police rushed to George’s door, stormed inside, and ripped out the cord strangling him.
George had saved his own life without the need of Lassie’s pansy help tips. The bad ass basset continues his walk on the wild side with an appetite for destruction here on Earth. The dog has a reputation to keep! The heroic hound hopes his newfound stardom will draw in the ladies, unite him with his biological father, whom he never met, and influence humans to go wireless. Look out for his new reality show, “Slobber Like A Rock Star” on Animal Planet this summer.
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